Johnny Bananas (Fake News Reporter!)

Johnny Bananas is the world's first Truly Professional Fake News Reporter! The legend of Johnny Bananas grows like a...well a ripe banana on a sick and dying tree.  Mr. Bananas (He/Is/Awesome) has taken fake news and satire and fused them into an artform that, once swallowed, goes down like a jagged little red pill that tastes like sweet honey.  As the saying goes, once you've gone Bananas you'll never go back.

Protesting Democracy

You’ve got to hand it to the several hundred Burlingtonians who braved severe climate change in order to carry hand-made handmaiden signs in a show of strong delusion that somebody still cares. The streets were lined with dirty snow and even dirtier human beings who apparently didn’t get the memo from their neighbors who are … Read more

Bananas: Big Win for Lesbians

The shocking news of yet another fire in California has been overshadowing the Cinderella story of the City of Angels slowly turning into the Isle of Lesbos.  Were it not for the massive conflagration the country would not have learned about the humongous achievement of local first responders setting aside their personal safety in favor … Read more

Photo credit: Thegoodshirts.com

Bananas:  Beg Your Pardon?

To “beg one’s pardon” is a polite and formal way of asking for forgiveness or apologizing for something. It’s often used when someone wants to express regret or acknowledge that they may have done something wrong, whether intentionally or unintentionally, you know like “Oops, I may have left an ounce of cocaine at your house … Read more

Bananas: The Cat’s Out of the Bag

The long awaited Disney production of Kamala Harris vs. Donald Trump finally hit the tiny screen on Wednesday as a nation of non-binary idiots gazed into their surveillance devices waiting to be told by millionaires which binary choice will be taking their money for the next four years.  The quality of the production was top … Read more

Bananas: Satan and Some Other Guy Endorse Trump

With every presidential election year comes the ominous October surprise.  However with things heating up at this week’s Democratic National Convention, the Prince of Darkness has surprised the world yet again by publicly endorsing Donald Trump, doing it of course during the hottest month in recorded history. Banana’s Media was able to catch up to … Read more

Bananas: A.I. Endorses Harris-Walz Campaign

The Harris-Walz campaign received a significant boost this past week by becoming the first ever presidential campaign to be fully endorsed by A.I. (Artificial Intelligence).  After announcing to their constituents they were democratically hand selecting Kamala Harris as their next presidential candidate, the campaign saw a significant boost in funding from donors who had grown … Read more

Bananas:  This is so…

The masters of political evolution have advanced the game of thrones for the presidency yet again by warning all those considering voting for Donald Trumplestilskins and his VP nominee Jayzee “Jazzy” Vance, to be very, very careful because….the two married heterosexual white men are…just plain weird. Of course, the highly funded priests and priestesses in … Read more

Bananas: Handicapping the Debate

The first presidential debate of 2024 between the Orange Man and the Old Man went off with all the pomp and circumstance of a game of bingo at the local senior center.  Despite both candidates having a record number of voters in 2020 the hosts at CNN were unable to get any attendees to join … Read more

Bananas: The Bear Necessities

A recent resurgence in womyn getting back to nature has become the hot topics on social media.  Social experiments revolving around bears versus men, primal screaming and cattiness calling out in congress and commencement speeches have seen the fairer sex exposing their claws and flaws for all to see.

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