In an amusing week for Carol Shea-Porter, in which she almost sounded McCarthyesque in her suspicions of Chinese communist cash infiltrations into the campaigns of domestic candidates, how long can it be before she blames her 2010 election loss on Global Warming?
You heard me right.
It’s been 57 days since Carol "I wasn’t saying the Chinese cost me my election" Shea-Porter lost and she has still not called the winner to congratulate him and concede the race personally. This is a woman scorned, trapped in a world of denial, in which it is acceptable to ignore the big business, special interest international/domestic union machine that funded her own campaign while continuing to make offhand remarks about foreign and special interest money that doesn’t even exist as is she has to keep working off the same talking points palm card until the DNC sends her a new one.
So why not blame something else that does not exist–global warming? Global warming is responsible for everything. If it gets warmer? Global Warming. If it gets colder? Global warming. Too much rain, too much snow, not enough rain not enough snow. Global Warming. Too many Hurricanes or too few…Global Warming. Erectile dysfunction, toenail fungus, and unwanted facial hair? Why not Global warming? How about the lack of sea rise…wont be long now but that will be caused by….global warming. (The water is trapped in all that snow they keep getting down south is my guess.)
So why did Carol lose in November? Global warming.
And who just happens to be the number one emitter of the mysterious super-gas you exhale every day that is credited with causing global warming? The Chinese. So the Chinese spend more money to emit Co2 (think in-kind donation) which causes the planet to do whatever it’s been doing for billions of years anyway, and bam! Carol loses the election and why can’t it be Mr. Lee’s fault…but then it’s not…"ancient Chinese secret, huh?"
I suspect she has it all worked out in a diorama made out of recycled bubble-gum and clown hair, right below the Nancy Pelosi shrine in the back of her bedroom closet. (Hard to miss the mephitic stench of brimstone.)
And now that we’ve got the Chinese connection worked out you know the next excuse is coming because it can never be what Carol did, or Carol meant, or what Carol voted for that she never had time to read. I’m just surprised she hasn’t blamed George Bush yet.
