SATIRE: Bernie Sanders, 85, Calls For New Generation Of Democratic Leaders, Suggests Someone In Their Late 70s

WASHINGTON — Sen. Bernie Sanders, 85, called on Senate Democrats Tuesday to choose a new generation of leaders, preferably someone in their late 70s with a fresh perspective.

“The time is now for change,” Sanders said at a Capitol news conference, “and by change I mean someone who has been in Congress at least 30 years, but not as long as I have, because that would be unfair to me.”

Sanders, who has served in Congress since 1991, said Sen. Chuck Schumer is “not going to run unopposed, I don’t think.” He said the ideal challenger is “young at heart and eligible for Social Security.”

Sanders, an independent who is not a Democrat, said he is uniquely qualified to tell Democrats whom to elect. “I’m not part of the establishment,” said Sanders, in the Senate.

Sen. Elissa Slotkin of Michigan, 50, who joined him at the news conference and said she is “a no until and unless” she sees a plan that is “definitively different,” was thanked by Sanders for “being a very young person.” Slotkin said she is not pursuing the job. Sanders called that “a relief, honestly.”

Sen. Chris Van Hollen, 67, who has said Democrats “shouldn’t have a coronation” and is in “listening mode,” was described by Sanders’ aides as “a promising youngster, give him 10 years.”

Sanders’ aides said the shortlist includes Sens. Jeanne Shaheen, 79, Peter Welch, 79, Ron Wyden, 77, and Elizabeth Warren, 77, who stood behind him holding a banner reading “New Generation.” Welch, who shares Sanders’ home state and is six years younger, was called “the kid of the group.”

Schumer, who is 75 and has led Senate Democrats for about a decade, said he is confident he will be elected leader. Schumer noted that he is 10 years younger than the man calling for a new generation.

Senate Democrats will hold their leadership elections in December.

At press time, Sanders had asked the Senate parliamentarian whether “new generation” could legally include anyone born before 1950.

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