While the Media waits to report on the Burkina Faso COVID 8675309 Variant, a “highly contagious™” respiratory ailment whose only cure happens to be socialism, we’ve got this!
It’s Made in China (see also the land of the rising virus), but the CCP seems confident it was a one-off, and there’s nothing to worry about – as if some virus is the real threat.
There has to be an expert working at MSNBC, CNN, or the Alphabet Networks who knows a scientist (or can name one) rumored to have some inside info on a litany of meaningless gestures we can mandate for the good of public health (disregarding that socialism is by far worse than most everything else humans have engineered).
We can affect fashion trends and change music, culture, and sports. Right in the middle, there can be some
riots peaceful protests.
Flatten that curve before people get used to normal, new, or any other kind.
“The 41-year-old man in Jiangsu province, northwest of Shanghai, was hospitalized April 28 and is in stable condition, the National Health Commission said on its website,” according to The Associated Press. “No human case of H10N3 has been reported elsewhere, the commission said.”
“This infection is an accidental cross-species transmission,” the statement from the Chinese Communist Party’s National Health Commission said. “The risk of large-scale transmission is low.” The NHC also added that the virus strain is a less severe strain of the virus in poultry.
No, it’s not. At present, H10N3 is as dangerous to you as Dihydrogen Monoxide, and the only way to flatten the curve is to ban man buns!
Anyone not conforming to this random and useless demand could lose boarding privileges on airplanes, access to public and private facilities and might need to be detained (then released) then fined because being detained might lead create a super-spreader event.
Moderna, Pfizer, and Johnson and Johnson are working diligently on special scissors specifically designed to prevent the spread of the man-bun H10N3 virus in both persistent man buns and the anticipated neck-beard variants.
Until then, the CDC recommends using the PCR test until it comes up with a positive test result, verified by repeating the process to get the identical result as confirmation.
Democrats will need to allocate 16 quadrillion Sponge Bob Dollars in an emergency session of congress to support
donors people and businesses donors affected by the response to this mandemic.
Anyone who has come into contact with a man bun should quarantine. In 14 months, after which fact-checkers™ and media watchdogs (woof!) will trickle out stories that hint that experts knew all along it was BS but didn’t want to interfere with all the socialism that was happening.
And yes, Governor Sununu will be extending the state of emergency and granting his family hereditary emergency order powers even when no state of emergency exists because, according to the courts, there is no law but his words.
Or, whatever…you let them get away with.
And just cuz it’s in the title…and maybe it’s Tommy Tutone’s fault…