To be a conservative is to wake up every morning to a new insult. It makes life more fun. I never know exactly what I am until I open up Twitter every morning. I can be a reactionary vermin, an ignorant caveman, an ultra-Catholic primate, or a neoliberal scorpion.
It’s fascinating how far the language reaches on the Left when it comes to labeling the Right. Today we conservatives are racist for not wanting to kneel before anything but God, just as yesterday we were fascists for defending law and order, the only way to guarantee freedom — incidentally, one of many words that has gone from being associated with the Left in the 1970s to being the provenance of the Right in our day. Today, Snow White is “sexist,” Gone with the Wind is “racist,” Scrooge McDuck is “ultraliberal,” and Tarzan . . . Oh my God! It’s all happening at once!
The other day, without going any further, a guy told me with contempt that Benedict XVI was “an ultra-Catholic.” Apparently, he meant it as an insult. I shrugged my shoulders, guessing that part of the Left must really expect the pope of the Catholic Church to be “moderately Catholic.” Perhaps they are right. At least if we consider that Marx, for example, was a bit ultra-Marxist…
…Generally speaking, the new Left attacks almost everything. Big cars pollute, football is sexist, eating meat is anti-animalist, compliments are sexist, globalization is imperialist, and wealth generates fear of the poor — this stupidity was spouted by the Communist vice president of Spain this week, who wants to criminalize “hatred of the poor” and who has a house 20 times the size of mine and who has 100 percent more swimming pools than I do. If you don’t believe in the environmentalist religion that tripled Al Gore’s weight, you are a denialist. If you don’t believe that the West is a horrible thing, you’re ethnocentric. In a way, the new Left embodies H. L. Mencken’s definition of puritanism: “the haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.”
-Itxu Diaz (Leftists Hurl All the Insults in the World)