Speaker Maxwell Re-names Herself Miss America

by
Op-Ed

Ahem. On November 17, GraniteGrok published two articles of mine. The one on Karoline Leavitt has got all the attention, while the hotter-than-hot one slipped away. Here it is, it’s about me trying to become Speaker of the US House.

I suppose I shouldn’t have announced my running for Speaker of the House with reference to the British Westminster system (photo of Big Ben). So today I am trying a new approach to get your attention. I am calling myself Miss America. Let me explain. (And it’s got nothing to do with the swimsuit competition, K?)

I had sent the Grokkers a video of me announcing my availability for the job of Speaker of the House. The video was made on September 8, 2022, before Nancy Pelosi showed any sign of quitting. In a recent email, I asked Skip to give me his opinion of the video. Apparently, he did not know that I was asking him to discuss it with me, so he went ahead and published it.

I suddenly found myself very happy. No further hopping from foot to foot, trying to decide whether to “announce.” It’s out there now, and I’ve spent the last 24 hours play-acting the role of Speaker.

(Quick summary of my article: it is perfectly legal for the House members on January 3 to choose any human being as their Speaker. I offer my services. I will conduct the proceedings of the House with no partisanship whatsoever. The US Constitution does not recognize the creature known as Party.)

I picture myself answering questions from MSM interviewers regarding my “campaign” for the speakership. (Note: one can only campaign to the 435 members of the House of Reps.)
Sample:

CNN: People are worried about the price of gasoline. What will you do to help?

Mary Maxwell: Nothing.

PBS: In your book “Boston’s Marathon Bombing,” you say that the judge, in that case, should be impeached. Will you act on that when you become Speaker?

Mary Maxwell: Of course not.

CBS News: Will you be supporting the Trump “MAGA” idea?

Mary Maxwell: It doesn’t matter.

Associated Press: How do you feel about Mitch McConnell?

Mary Maxwell: It’s none of your business.

See, when I am Speaker of the House, I will be neutral on everything except the business aspects of running the day’s session of the legislature. Adjournments, amendments, debating time, roll call, asking the Sergeant at Arms to kick smokers out of the gallery, whatever is in my bailiwick. I can express no position on gasoline, abortion, or the attack on Nancy Pelosi’s husband. Although in real life, I’m a registered Republican, I will be party-less to the nth degree.

My goal is to stop the belief, which has developed only in the 21st century, that Congress is run by the party in power and, indeed, by the one leader of that Party. THAT’S the Westminster system. In a Westminster country, such as Australia, where I lived for more than 30 years, a Labor Party prime minister can enact a new law without parliamentary discussion since all MPs of his Party must obey him.

It’s a horrible joke on our Founding Fathers to imitate that here, and I say it can be gotten rid of in one fell swoop. I say the US House of Reps shouldn’t have a partisan Speaker. Goodbye, partisan Speaker, hello, open arguments on every subject. Remember relying on reason instead of on scoring points in the red/blue game? Huh? Remember that?

The New Miss America

So what’s with the Miss America title? you can blame Skip, editor of GranteGrok.com, who took me off guard by publishing the video. I could suddenly picture myself in this new role of neutrality, and what an unanticipated feeling of joy I got from it! I imagined myself shouting Americanism instead of Republicanism. I imagined people being able to come to me with their concerns and not expect to have to tiptoe around ideological doctrines.

Ideology — out!

Please know that I don’t oppose the contents of my Party’s doctrine. Have you read my newest book “Keep the Republic, Kill the Takeover”? It’s extremely American. Good American stuff, great American stuff. How unbelievably lucky we are to have the Constitution.

I was born in Boston in 1947. To our generation, the Baby boomers, American ideals were as real as the flora and fauna. They WERE the flora and fauna. I think they ARE the flora and fauna.

Law is the main thing. To have good law, and a huge nation of supporters of that law (we number 320 million at the moment) is the key to overcoming chaos, on the one hand, or regimentation by a dictator on the other.

The message we Baby boomers are holding for you is that it can be done because WE ALREADY SAW IT BEING DONE. Don’t let your old grandparents go until they’ve explained this to you. We had a fine system and there is no reason for it to go to the garbage can.

Many of us can see that it’s on its way to the garbage can, AND we know the particulars causes of that ridiculous journey. Sure, it’s hard to get the word out about that, since it entails criticism of individual power-holders, but we do have strength against that, in law. Furthermore, it IS THE FAULT OF ALL OF US to have let things proceed so far. Garbage-can city is nigh.

Ah, just as I was writing this (pre-noon Nov 18), a notification came in that Kamala Harris and Jeb Bush have each announced a 2024 run for the White House. Dear People, don’t allow media for the next two years to take up your time with “personality” elections. In fact, don’t allow them to take up your time at all. A new president is not the key to our survival. WE ARE THAT KEY.

Note: Before the 2020 primary, David Thistle of Texas offered to be the receiver of applications for the presidential job. Each person (age 35 and up, USA born) need only write a page as to his/her qualifications. Atta boy, Thistle. You tell ’em!

And a friend has just called me to say that a GETTR person is recruiting Trump for Speaker in 2023 (my job). Jeepers, I don’t think he has the necessary Miss America restraint, but at least it would start some chat on the subject.

Anyone wanting to blather about this, please show up at my humble abode on Sunday November 20 at 2pm. I need RSVP-ing: MaxwellMaryLLB@gmail.com. Also, please check back at this article’s Comments for any changes. I live at 175 Loudon Road, Apt 6, in, by the grace of God, Concord NH. It’s in the back row of buildings, on the far left. You can park behind it, or at Windmill Restaurant which closes Sundays at 3.

Everyone welcome, including Demonrats.

“We are an equal-opportunity bunch of cockeyed optimists.” [Blame Skip! He started this!]

 

 

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