| CALIFORNIA | TEXAS | |
| Arsenal of Weapons | Gun Collection | |
| Delicate Wetlands | Swamp | |
| Undocumented Worker | Illegal Alien | |
| Cruelty-Free Materials | Syn the tic Fiber | |
| Assault and Battery | Attitude Adjustment | |
| Heavily Armed | Well-protected | |
| Narrow-minded | Righteous | |
| Taxes or Your Fair Share | Coerced Theft | |
| Commonsense Gun Control | Gun Confiscation Plot | |
| Illegal Hazardous Explosives | Fireworks or Stump Removal | |
| Nonviable Tissue Mass | Unborn Baby | |
| Equal Access to Opportunity | Socialism | |
| Multicultural Community | High Crime Area | |
| Fairness or Social Progress | Marxism | |
| Upper Class or "The Rich " | Self-Employed | |
| Progressive, Change | Big Government Scheme | |
| Homeless or Disadvantaged | Bums or Welfare Leeches | |
| Sniper Rifle | Scoped Deer Rifle | |
| Investment For the Future | Higher Taxes | |
| Healthcare Reform | Socialized Medicine | |
| Extremist, Judgmental, or Hater | Conservative | |
| Truants | Homeschoolers | |
| Victim or Oppressed | Criminal or Lazy Good-For-Nothing | |
| High Capacity Magazine | Standard Capacity Magazine | |
| Religious Zealot | Church-going | |
| Reintroduced Wolves | Sheep and Elk Killers | |
| Fair Trade Coffee | Overpriced Yuppie Coffee | |
| Exploiters or "The Rich " | Employed or Land Owner | |
| The Gun Lobby | NRA Members | |
| Assault Weapon | Semi-Auto (Grandpa’s M1 Carbine) | |
| Fiscal Stimulus | New Taxes and Higher Taxes | |
| Mandated Eco-Friendly Lighting | Chinese Mercury-Laden Light Bulbs |
(H/T: Steve B)
