KLAR: There Was an Old Lady….

I spoke at Vermont’s annual Liberty Food Fest on December 12 regarding the benefits of grass-fed over grain-fed beef. To spice it up a bit and keep my audience’s attention, I repurposed a nursery rhyme for the occasion. (I even sang it!)

Here are the lyrics of my 2025 version of the classic children’s rhyme:

There was an old lady who swallowed a cow;

I don’t know how she swallowed a cow!

She swallowed the cow to save the planet,

That couldn’t handle so much methane on it.

She swallowed fake meats made from GMOs,

Peddled as healthy by the WHO.

She swallowed bug burgers to reduce global carbon,

And enrich the WEF in the bargain,

She swallowed lab-chicken grown in a tube

Bill Gates chuckled and called her a rube

She drank fructose syrup, and seed oil fats

Made from waste products and processed in vats

She swallowed Doritos and pizza with anchovies

Then took her shots of Ozempic and Wegovy

She ate 14 Twinkies with soda and then

She prevented her death with some insulin

She swallowed the food pyramid that her healthcare provider

Gave her to wiggle and tickle inside her

She swallowed the media’s great big lies;

I don’t know why she swallowed the lies – I guess she’ll die!


I call this version “There Was An Old Lady Who Swallowed a Lie!” You can watch the video here.

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