There were a couple of nuggets in a couple of VT Digger stories that, taken together, are worth noting because they highlight a real problem with how things currently run under the Golden Dome – that is, with a maturity level found in your average middle school cafeteria.
The first piece comes from a story about the Addison County Democrat senate primary. Representative Caleb Elder (D-Starksboro) is looking to replace one of the two incumbents, Chris Bray or Ruth Hardy. The big reason behind Elder’s ambition, at least according to him, isn’t so much a problem with the folks he’s challenging, but rather he’s desperate to escape the toxic environment created by the folks in his House Democrat Caucus. Says Elder,
“Leadership made it clear the doors were shut for me to participate there,” he said. “But I’m a stubborn person. And I, for the sake of my three- and five-year-old daughters and all kids in Vermont, have been determined to participate. And so I’m going to the Senate to see if I can have a seat at the table there.”
Elder said he butted heads with Democratic leaders in the House because he didn’t like how top-down the decision-making process in the chamber was. He recalled being told on several occasions to “jump on board or be thrown off the train.”
“Leadership” throwing would-be independent thinkers off said train are Speaker of the House Jill Krowinski (D-Burlington), Majority Leader Emily Long (D-Newfane), Whip Kathleen James (D-Manchester), and Assistant Majority Leaders William Notte (D-Rutland) and Jenna Brown (D-Richmond). In keeping with the metaphor, this is no way to run a railroad, though Generalissimo Francisco Franco may disagree.
The story jibes with an account coming out of another – and really, truly bizarre — article about an ethics complaint made against Lieutenant Governor David Zuckerman (Democrat/Progressive-VT) that he was making some female lawmakers uncomfortable by telling them he kept a supply of feminine hygiene products in his office that they were welcome to avail themselves of should the necessity arise. Maybe we’ll unpack all that another time, but the key point for this post is that Rep. Heather Chase (D-Chester), Zuckerman’s accuser, recounted the LTG warned her when she was a new house member that,
“legislative leadership can behave ‘like a bunch of schoolgirls, high school girls, maybe, who will talk behind your back, stab you behind your back.’”
Cuz that’s the kind of people we want controlling our $8.6 billion budget and deciding who gets things like healthcare, am I right?
Zuckerman, speaking to Digger, denied trashing House leadership so pointedly but stood by his “like high school” description of the State House vibe. Still not encouraging. But one has to wonder if this calculated hit on Zuckerman is a revenge plot for his daring to dish dirt to the newbies about what’s really up with cool kids’ clique. Seriously, eighteen months after the alleged sexual harassment complaint was made and apparently dealt with, it comes out in the press – in a 3800-word story, no less!! — one week before the primary election, where Zuckerman has a competitive race? That’s some serious Mean Girls action happening right there! Knifed in the back, indeed, with traces of glitter nail polish on the handle.
Poor Dave…. He thought he was being all good and woke, checking his white male privilege and using it to be a feminist ally, and what does he get? “Creeper!” written in lipstick on his locker right before the prom. Heather Chase, though, she’s in with the in-crowd now! Helped them humiliate the dork who tried to be nice to her when she had no friends.
Speaking of Mean Girls, and this does not bode well for Caleb Elder should his senate bid succeed, I have it from a reliable but understandably anonymous source inside the building that there is actually a band of female senators known not so affectionately amongst their colleagues as the “Mean Girls” after the 2004 Lindsey Lohan high school comedy/drama of that name. (That was 20 years ago? I am old….) I’m not going to name names, but Mr. Elder, if you do make it to the upper chamber, maybe don’t try to get in good with these women by offering them free tampons out of your briefcase.
What you should do is take Speaker Krowinski’s written instructions to Zuckerman and only conduct meetings with women when someone else present. You know, just like Mike Pence always did because that policy…. Wait…. Never mind…. You’re screwed no matter what you do!
While there is no doubt some genuine entertainment value in all of this, the serious side of it is that these very unserious but highly toxic people are making major decisions that affect our lives in very real ways. Is it any wonder our education system and the way we fund it doesn’t get fixed? That our energy policies are about as realistic and well thought out as a seventh grade social studies project? Nobody seems to understand basic math.
There’s a reason why our Founding Fathers valued limited government: too often the people who end up get elected are the last ones in the world you want solving problems so, give them as few tasks to do and as little money as possible. Wisdom! In the meantime, how about this November, we replace the middle schoolers with some actual adults with real-world problem-solving skills? We can’t afford to be governed any longer by people who probably used a folded paper fortune teller to determine who’s going to chair the Appropriations Committee.
