Editor’s Note: This Mom is writing about the NHSBA sponsored Policy JBAB (“Transgender and Non-Conforming Students”) which many NH School Districts including the Manchester School District, under the moniker of JBAB or similar, have enacted.
It contains language which demands that District staff lie to Parents (by commission or omission) as well as taking away Free Speech Rights). Emphasis added. More on Manchester School Board Jim O’Connell’s gaslighting of Parents here at Girard at Large.
The writer’s name is being withheld as she works in the NH education field so as to stop any attempts at retaliation. I have talked with this person and verified the story.
Full Disclosure: My lawsuit against the Gilford School Board is awaiting a decision by the judge on “standing” on this same point although I have been a taxpayer in Gilford for 36 years and my legally adopted Grandson is in the Gilford School system. The Gilford School Board is still trying to have the case thrown out. -Skip
To the Editor:
Did you know that Manchester School District is slowly taking away your rights as a parent? The school district is passing policies that take away your rights without you even being aware. Did you know that your child regardless of age can ask teachers to address them by a different name, not a nickname but a whole different name and ask to be identified by a different gender and the school personnel will not notify the parents? Did you know that they are held to a policy that was adopted by the Manchester School Board that states that the school will NOT notify parents about these changes? Did you also know that your child could ask to be identified by a different gender and the school must allow your child to use the bathroom that your child identifies as?
Sadly, I had this experience this year with my 12 year old daughter who is a 7th grade student at a Manchester middle school. I found out she decided to change her name by happenstance. The school did not ask me if I approved of this change. The school respected my daughter’s wishes without consulting her legal guardian, her mother. Once I learned of this, I asked the teachers to address her by her legal name. The teachers continued to call her by the name she requested. When I spoke to my daughter about this she told me that there are lots of kids changing their names in school. I thought this was a phase but I did my research and began digging to find information about what my daughter was going through at school. I found underlying concerns that needed to be addressed by a professional. Had I not accidentally found out about her name change, it is possible I would not have investigated further about why she was changing her name and identity and would have considered it a passing fad.
In January, I emailed every teacher and principal to formally request that they address my daughter by her legal name and to refer to her as a female. I also asked what the protocol is when a child decides to change their name and/or gender. The principal responded and said that due to the school board policy, school personal will address my child by what she wants to be addressed as regardless of what I asked for. She sent me the school board policy that states that the school will NOT notify a parent if a child chooses to change their identity. I have added the policy at the bottom of this article.
When did the school board decide what is in the best interest of our children? When did the school board decide that it is OK not to notify a parent or guardian when a child dramatically changes their identity? As a parent, this is a HUGE red flag that something is going on with our child and needs attention. Had I not found out about my child changing her name, I may not have gotten her the therapy she desperately needed.
Since children spend most of their hours in school, we should be informed about what is going on in their daily lives. I am certain that there are many parents that are not aware of this policy and it needs to be addressed and changed. I spoke with Jim O’Connell, member or the Manchester school committee, and he stated that his expectation is that the school personnel would contact families if a child asks to be addressed by a different name or gender. I don’t know how he could “expect” this when it is clearly written in the policy,
“School personnel should not disclose information that may reveal a student’s transgender status or gender nonconforming presentation to others, including parents and other school personnel, unless legally required to do so or unless the student has authorized such disclosure”.
He said he would look into the protocol from each school. I gave him over a week and emailed him again. He hadn’t spoken to the schools.
As parents, we need to take our rights back. I am disgusted that this policy does not allow parents to know what is going on inside the schools. Please contact the school district and school board and let them know your feelings about this policy at: https://bosc.mansd.org/ .
This is [part of] the policy that takes away our rights as a parent/legal guardian:
III. GUIDANCE
A. Privacy
The Board recognizes a student’s right to keep private one’s transgender status or gender nonconforming presentation at school. Information about a student’s transgender status, legal name, or gender assigned at birth also may constitute confidential information. School personnel should not disclose information that may reveal a student’s transgender status or gender nonconforming presentation to others, including parents and other school personnel, unless legally required to do so or unless the student has authorized such disclosure. Transgender and gender nonconforming students have the right to discuss and express their gender identity and expression openly and to decide when, with whom, and how much to share private information.
When contacting the parent or guardian of a transgender or gender nonconforming student, school personnel should use the student’s legal name and the pronoun corresponding to the student’s gender assigned at birth unless the student, parent, or guardian has specified otherwise. Any student who has a need or desire for increased privacy, regardless of the underlying reason, should be provided with a reasonable alternative to meet the need for that individual’s privacy, regardless of gender identity.
B. Official Record
The District is required to maintain a mandatory permanent pupil record (“official record”) that includes a student’s legal name and legal gender. However, the District is not required to use a student’s legal name and gender on other school records or documents. The District will change a student’s official record to reflect a change in legal name or legal gender upon receipt of documentation that such change has been made pursuant to a court order. In situations where school staff or administrators are required by law to use or to report a transgender student’s legal name or gender, such as for purposes of standardized testing, school staff and administrators shall adopt practices to avoid the inadvertent disclosure of such confidential information.
C. Names/Pronouns
A student has the right to be addressed by a name and pronoun that corresponds to the student’s gender identity. A court-ordered name or gender change is not required, and the student need not change his or her official records. The intentional or persistent refusal to respect a student’s gender identity (for example, intentionally referring to the student by a name or pronoun that does not correspond to the student’s gender identity) is a violation of this policy.D. Gender-Segregated Activities
To the extent possible, schools should reduce or eliminate the practice of segregating students by gender. In situations where students are segregated by gender, such as for health education classes, students should be included in the group that corresponds to their gender identity. Any student who has a need or desire for increased privacy, regardless of the underlying reason, should be provided with a reasonable alternative to maintain that individual’s right to privacy during student activities that are segregated by gender.E. Restroom Accessibility
Students shall have access to the restroom that corresponds to their gender identity consistently asserted at school. Any student who has a need or desire for increased privacy, regardless of the underlying reason, should be provided access to a single stall restroom, but no student shall be required to use such a restroom.F. Locker Room Accessibility
The use of locker rooms by transgender students shall be assessed on a case-by-case basis with the goals of maximizing the student’s social integration and equal opportunity to participate in physical education classes and sports, ensuring the student’s safety and comfort, and minimizing stigmatization of the student. In most cases, transgender students should have access to the locker room that corresponds to their gender identity consistently asserted at school. Any student who has a need or desire for increased privacy, regardless of the underlying reason, should be provided with a reasonable alternative changing area such as the use of a private area (e.g., a nearby restroom stall with a door, an area separated by a curtain, a P.E. instructor’s office in the locker room, or a nearby health office restroom), or with a separate changing schedule (e.g., using the locker room that corresponds to their gender identity before or after other students). Any alternative arrangement should be provided in a way that protects the student’s ability to keep his or her transgender status confidential. In no case shall a transgender student be required to use a locker room that conflicts with the student’s gender identity.G. Physical Education Classes & Intramural Sports
Transgender and gender nonconforming students shall be permitted to participate in physical education classes and intramural sports in a manner consistent with their gender identity.H. Interscholastic Competitive Sports Teams
Transgender and gender nonconforming students shall be permitted to participate in interscholastic athletics in a manner consistent with their gender identity. This policy is in line with current (2021) New Hampshire Interscholastic Athletic Association (NHIAA) guidance regarding participation of transgender and gender nonconforming students in athletics.I. Dress Codes
Transgender and gender nonconforming students have the right to dress in a manner consistent with their gender identity or gender expression. In general, schools may not adopt dress codes that restrict students’ clothing or appearance on the basis of gender.J. Discrimination/Harassment
It is the responsibility of each school and the District to ensure that transgender and gender nonconforming students have a safe school environment. This includes ensuring that any incident of discrimination, harassment, or violence is given immediate attention, including investigating the incident, taking appropriate corrective action, and providing students and staff with appropriate resources. Complaints alleging discrimination or harassment based on a person’s actual or perceived transgender status or gender nonconformity are to be handled in the same manner as other discrimination or harassment complaints.Legal References:
NH RSA 193:38: Discrimination in Public Schools
NHIAA By-Laws, Article 2, Section 21 (2020-2021 school year)2021 Adoption
First Reading (Policy Committee): 1/12/21
Second Reading and BOSC Approval: 2/8/21
