Confucius said that the first step towards wisdom is to call things by their right names. What would happen if we applied this idea to renaming government agencies?
As an example, let’s consider the inaptly-named Department of Safety. If you work for an agency with that name, it’s hard not to think that your job is, well, to keep people safe — even if they don’t want you to.
But if we recall the words of the Declaration of Independence — that men form governments to protect their rights — then it would make more sense to rename that department something like the Department of Rights Protection.
Now, if you’re working for a department with that name — if the name is featured prominently on your vehicle, and on your uniform, and on your pay stubs — then you would, I suspect, find it harder to justify violating someone’s rights in the name of keeping him ‘safer’. So you might find yourself unwilling to enforce laws that embody this trade-off… and that might dissuade the legislature from passing laws that aren’t going to be enforced, because they shouldn’t be enforced. Doesn’t that sound like a step towards wisdom?
As another example, every time I drive past the cluster of buildings that houses the Department of Education, I almost instinctively react by thinking that it should be called the Department of Schooling, since it’s clear that education makes up an increasingly minor part of the mission of what we now call schools.
Or perhaps the Department of Government Schooling. Or, if we’re going for pinpoint accuracy, the Department of Welfare Schooling. That would make it clear that its mission is to provide schooling– i.e., day care, transportation, nutrition, therapy, and so on, with a little education thrown in — for the children of parents who are unable, or unwilling, to take responsibility for their educations.
Imagine how just changing the name might affect decisions by parents about how to educate their children. Imagine how it might affect decisions by taxpayers about what kinds of subjects should be taught, what kinds of activities should be subsidized, and so on. I think that would also be a step towards wisdom.
Some departments, if named properly, would probably have to be shuttered. For example, consider what might happen if we combined several existing agencies — like the Department of Barbering, Cosmetology, and Esthetics, the Board of Acupuncture Licensing, and so on — into a single agency with an accurate name like the Department of Hindering Competition in Various Trades and Industries. Juxtaposing the new name with the text of Article 83 of the state constitution,
Free and fair competition in the trades and industries is an inherent and essential right of the people and should be protected against all monopolies and conspiracies which tend to hinder or destroy it.
would make it clear (to everyone but judges, at least) that the department shouldn’t exist at all.
It boggles the mind to think of how much useless and unconstitutional regulation and redistribution could be eliminated by simply replacing euphemisms with accurate descriptions.
(The deadline for submitting bills is fast approaching. If there are any legislators out there who would consider submitting a bill to rename various agencies, I’d be more than happy to work with you on it!)
