What Happens to Your Body An Hour After Drinking Organic Kale Juice…

by
Steve MacDonald

Did you see the Coca-Cola junk Science graphic that made its way around Facebook? Did you share it? It is titled ‘What Coca-Cola Really Does to Your Body After One Hour’… and it did not include the word ‘refreshment’.

Not long after the contagious spread began it became apparent the claims were hyperbolic and factually..well, there were problems with those fact-thingys.  So CEI decided to have some equally ‘scientific’ fun at the expense of Kale Juice – and who doesn’t want to do that?

In the first ten minutes, “you are overcome by a sense of smug satisfaction…”

After 20 minutes, “self-righteousness begins to affect the left half of your brain…”

At 40 minutes, “Sanctimony seeps into your pre-frontal cortex, resulting in impaired reasoning. “Thank goodness there’s no such thing as GMO kale!” Who cares that every reputable scientific body has found GMOs to be safe.You learned how bad they are from a clever Facebook infographic. Also, you now understand how NASA faked the moon landing.”

At 50 Minutes, “Damage to your frontal lobe causes you to make absurd claims: “This kale came from a local farmer’s market, and that means fewer food miles than food shipped cross country.”

Read the full list of Kale Juice induced “symptoms” below.

Pop-out pop-out-120the PDF to get a better look.

[su_document url=”http://granitegrok.com/wp-content/uploads/BPA_KaleDrinkParody-4.pdf” width=”540″ height=”660″]

Author

  • Steve MacDonald

    Steve is a long-time New Hampshire resident, blogger, and a member of the Board of directors of The 603 Alliance. He is the owner of Grok Media LLC and the Managing Editor of GraniteGrok.com, a former board member of the Republican Liberty Caucus of New Hampshire, and a past contributor to the Franklin Center for Public Policy.

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