Palate Cleanser: yeah, I admit it - I've done the same thing. No, although the Jerk thought I was the jerk... - Granite Grok

Palate Cleanser: yeah, I admit it – I’ve done the same thing. No, although the Jerk thought I was the jerk…

Some guys at an office decided that the Jerk with the new expense sports car needed a comeuppance of a “you’re a Jerk” message.  I’m betting that this is at a place where part of the pecking order involves “parking near the door” and this guy was constantly doing what we all hate: parking sideways or “on the line” to make sure that nobody else was going to even dare to park next to him.  Yeah, we all get sloppy parking once in a while, but apparently not this self-important dude.  Who knows what the reason was – didn’t want his “baby” scratched or just an overblown sense of entitlement (“Think my car is cool?  Wait til you see me!”).

His co-workers were not impressed – and decided simple was best:

I have to admit, in a different circumstance, I did the same thing to another “parking space jerk”:

Going out to eat on a day where almost everyone else had taken a bite out of my better nature, I was feeling rather, um, thin-skinned.  The lot was pretty much full and I could only see one spot available – with a big old Olds parked right on their left side lane marker.  With bucket seats.  I didn’t care – and under the Law of Driving In Boston (i.e., the Oldest and the Biggest) I slid my car right into that space to his left with an even amount of space between my tires and the lines on both sides.  Oh yeah…

….I was driving my Suburban at the time.  Which meant that there was very little space left but NOBODY could accuse me of “shading it to my right” – I played it strictly up the middle. Even my Eldest, still a kid at the time, couldn’t have fit between them.   Unlike the Jerk in the video, trying to clamber across bucket seats in an already small vehicle, we had full size bench seats in all three rows  so it was rather easy for all of the passengers to slid out on our left side without affecting the car on OUR left.  I smiled, locked the car, and went in to eat.  Yes, to relish what was going to be on the “other” menu – and I was not disappointed.  It was ALL delicious!

About 1/2 through MY meal, I noticed that a somewhat older guy than I was, possessing a much larger girth than I,  rather animatedly talking with the manager – BOY, my food was tasting even BETTAH!  The manager came to the “front of the house” and asked “Does anyone have a blue Suburban”?  The Eldest caught my eye, and then shook his head ever so slightly and looked down.  Knowing the mood I was in, he dared not to butt in (which he sometimes does).  I raised my hand and the manager came over.

She: “Er, this gentleman is complaining that you parked in such a way that he cannot get into his car.  His party has finished their meal and they would like to go home. Would you mind moving your car?”

Me: “well, I haven’t finished – No.”  I don’t think she was expecting that.  Nor him, either.  He came walking over.

She: “Why won’t you?  That’s not being very nice.”

Me: “He has complained.  I’m not done, nor anyone else in my party.  Have YOU, ma’am, gone out and looked at the situation?”

She: “No, it’s raining outside”

Me: “I know, I can see that his jacket is wet- another reason my answer is no”.  She grimaced.  I don’t think she was too impressed with my pleasant polite smile and demeanor.  He sure wasn’t.

Me: “Go look at the two cars – if YOU think that I am at fault,  and that I have parked wrongly or unevenly, I will get up and move my car.”  He smirked, she had a peeved look, and the folks with me were starting to silently giggle, trying hard not to look at each other – or me.  I tried to put on my best angelic face – I don’t think it worked on her.  It certainly didn’t with him.

She did go out.  And came back.

She: “No, sir, you are parked parked straight into the space.  You are not at fault”.

She (to the Jerk): “Sir, I’m going to ask you to wait in the waiting area if this gentleman wishes to finish his meal first; it is YOUR car that is parked badly – right on the left edge.”  He glowered and his mouth started to open – and then got a glimpse of his wife who had followed the manager over to table.

The clam chowder, burger, and hot fudge sundae never tasted so good.

(H/T: The Blaze)

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