So, who IS Obama supposed to be? President? Daddy? Sugar Daddy? Husband? I'm SO confused! - Granite Grok

So, who IS Obama supposed to be? President? Daddy? Sugar Daddy? Husband? I’m SO confused!

I’m on the email list for “Obama for something” so when I received my very own personalized email (Hey, they know me as  “Friend”) talking about Father’s Day from Caroline Kennedy, I just had to take notice:

Friend —

I grew up in the White House. I remember as a small child visiting my father in the Oval Office while he worked.  But really, we could have been growing up in any American home. We were just children, happy to see our dad — even if he was stepping out of a helicopter that had landed on our front lawn.  That’s why, on Father’s Day, I’m thinking of Michelle Obama and the girls, and the time they’ll get to spend with the President as a family.  I can appreciate how long the days can be — and how wonderful it feels to know that, no matter how full your father’s plate is, you’re the best part of his day and the most important part of his life.  So I’m joining Michelle and others all around the country to wish the President a happy Father’s Day.   As you acknowledge a special father figure in your own life, I hope you’ll join me by adding your name to tell Barack how much he means to all of us:

Riiiight.  So I, as a Father, should now get all  warm, fuzzy, and looney, to think that I need to send Obama a Father’s Day Card because he’s the President?  Or because he’s taking such a beating during this campaign that my simple gesture would make him feel better?

But then I saw this a week later:

Still my very own specialized email (Hey, they still know me as “Friend”) – this time, not from Caroline Kennedy but from Moochella herself (I guess she forgives me for misspelling her name – my fingers aren’t working too well today):

Friend —

For the first 10 years of our marriage, Barack and I lived in an apartment in my hometown of Chicago.

The winters there can be pretty harsh, but no matter how snowy or icy it got, Barack would head out into the cold — shovel in hand — to dig my car out before I went to work.  In all our years of marriage, he’s always looked out for me. Now, I see that same commitment every day to you and to this country…The only way we’ll win this election is if we can rely on one another like that, all the way to November 6th. Barack is working hard, but he can’t do this alone — he needs your help.

Michelle

Hrumph – how come Ben Shapiro’s version of my email, over at Breitbart, actually has his name on it???  But if Moochella wants me to think of Obama as a husband, that he’s watching out for me just like he does for Moochella, well, that’s kinda getting creepy – REAL creepy.   At least if Obama was my daddy, I could rationalize Ben getting his name on his email as me just being the son that Obama thinks is second rate (or would that be third rate – I don’t look anything like Trayvon Martin).  But I keep thinking about what he said about a “typical white person“, doesn’t that mean that the high regard he must hold me in be the same as Michelle? Gosh, this just keeps shoving me down the family totem pole… Gak!

But WAIT!  It gets worse (but at least I’m off the hook entirely for this one)!  At least I didn’t have to take part in this poll, which shows that Obama has another role to play: SUGAR DADDY!  And I’m betting that the loser in this 2 person heads-up poll is just fine and dandy with it.  From IBTimes:

Presidential Sugar Daddy: Obama Beats ‘Vanilla’ Romney Among Seeking Arrangement Sugar Babies

If the presidential race were determined by who women think will make a better sugar daddy, President Barack Obama would trounce Mitt Romney, according to a survey from the hookup site SeekingArrangement.com that found women want Obama to be their sugar daddy by a 3-to-1 margin over the former Massachusetts governor.

“Despite Romney’s good looks, his starchy ‘vanilla’ image may be the reason why he lost to Obama, at least where factors such as sexiness, personality, approachability and likeability matters,” SeekingArrangement.com Founder and CEO Brandon Wade said in a statement. “According to our survey, most women say they chose Obama because he is more trustworthy, charismatic and sexy. Obama is funny and is known to be a good dancer. Unfortunately, Romney is still viewed by many as the ‘vanilla’ candidate.”

SeekingArrangement.com for older, wealthier men – known in the culture as sugar daddies – with younger, attractive women. The arrangements also work the other way around, with older, affluent women finding younger, handsome men on the site.

Of the 30,000 female sugar babies on SeekingArrangement.com surveyed over the past week, 34.1 percent say they prefer having Obama as their sugar daddy, with Romney taking 11.9 percent of the vote.

Well, being the Socialist that he is and always with the mantra of “spreading the wealth around”, this must make him one happy dude (but the visualization of Moochella with an iron frying pan makes me rather jovial, though).  And you know, there’s reinforcement for this idea too: “Obama said. “We are a better country because of these commitments. I’ll go further – we would not be a great country without those commitments.”  As opposed to regular daddies (and mommies too)?

My only problem is – how the heck can I make the sequeway to this Obama campaign story?  If I thought that Obama being my husband is creepy, this just shoves that idea right off the Left of the political stage:

I just cannot think of the amount of chutzpah that it took to not only come up with this idea but to also actually put it out there?

Oh wait, doesn’t this stoop to the level of giving His Majesty Queen Elizabeth an iPod full of herself?  Or the DVD set to the Prime Minister Gordon Brown that couldn’t be played in played in the UK?  Just tell me one thing: are we going to do to him what Obama did to the bust of Churchill – but who would we give him back to?

Oh, no problem – the Chicago based Socialist New Party!

 

 

 

 

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